Clearly, I should have spent alot of time thinking about The Pact topic tonight, but I didn’t. I went to bed early and was rewarded by waking up at 4 am. I have the worst sleeping patterns sometimes! In any case, over the course of the night I have attempted to think about KJ’s situation but I keep coming back to the same sentiment

… Do what you think is the best thing for you & your future … 

But can I say that tomorrow morning? As the best friend/roommate/cousin/Quita, shouldn’t I have more to say? Loads of advice? random thoughts? gut feelings regarding the topic ~ those I definitely have. Truthfully, when the initial statement was made, I had a litany of thoughts, possibilities, and variations of the situation & all involved. I could probably list my opinions in 20 minutes but I’m not going to. My overwhelming spirit tells me to keep quiet on this one, even to the Quitas. My analysis of the situation is from my own unique perspective & I’m not going to tell others how to live their lives or what’s in their deepest heart of hearts. I’m going to listen to my gut. I keep having the same thought so I might as well voice it and thus releasing the bird from it’s cage, I can move on to getting my life right. 6:05 am and I’m crawling back into bed.

The Quita Crew made a pack. One of three made a statement around 3:30 pm and the trio agreed not to discuss their opinions regarding the statement until the following day. So, being that I am a Quita, I can’t talk to anyone about this, but my private blog that is totally available to the public, can hear my inner most thoughts on the subject. To me it’s a journal today. Let me preface a few things…. The last 24 hours I’ve been to a 4 hour class after being up all night talking to a new guy (with whom I’m in the really lovely beginning phases of ?), went to the late show at the movies and not getting to bed until 5 am this morning - up at 10 am. I’m whipped, exhausted and any other culturally acceptable word for the itis that you can think of.   

Last night I saw the Sex In The City movie premiere, well the national theatres premiere, but I went to the 12:01 am showing. LOL! Anyhow, if you’ve seen it you’ll be more understanding of this blog subject. I saw it with my best friend and our mutual roommate & I enjoyed it. It was like a super long episode that tied everything up nice & neat, just the way the hopeless romantic wants it to. . . another movie that gives its viewers EXACTLY what they want. My favorite scenes involve flying roses & shower water. Yet I digress, on to the meat of this sandwich. . . The Pact. 

Lounging in the house, KJ very seriously told TJ, who immeadiately notified SJ, the third Quita, via the work phone… with all the pomp & circumstance such a statement deserves, each listener heard ”tomorrow eric & i are going to get married.”

The background in short: Eric moves to NYC in a week or so. An 8 hour drive from where we live. The non exclusive, non committed couple held a relationship via instant messaging & email for about 10 months. Finally trading phone numbers, they began to text but rarely talk. It’s now about 2 weeks later. Eric has a very profitable professional job and can keep KJ in the desired lifestyle, he moves with his job and they are considering getting married tomorrow. I know for sure that as recently as 3 days ago, they had never seen each other face to face. That was the same day KJ discovered Eric’s real name, but for the purposes of this blog, the alias will remain. I’m not sure after that whether they have met or not. To the average reader, this sounds like an internet classic right? But what are going to be the makings? Love story or dramatic disaster? 

It’s now 4:45 pm.

I think I have very factually presented the case. 

I’m going to think on this & keep true to The Pact.

My opinion will be none other than my own by avoiding external discussion regarding this topic.

Until tomorrow.

So I wrote something… maybe a poem… maybe a story… maybe just some random thots about one topic: Live Shows & the hard work behind them…. I sat in a theater style venue in a foreign country writing on the back of my driving directions . . . I write alot & I’m too shy or insecure to publish them but this “creation” has stayed with me the past few weeks so I’m blogging it out…. It’s pretty obvious & simple but also pure . . . what do you think?

Load In to Load Up

rollers clicking past
cases thud against the riser
radio echos surround me
as lamenates & keychains
jingle circles in the air

the trailer spills out her wares
a puzzle to please the masses
as kits & rigs come together
here is the pleasure center
becoming whole once again

silent as a church mouse
I, the lone observer
witness to hard labor
a mostly undetected voyeour
observing & learning
more hidden magic tricks

cables are run
speakers set in place
banner hung high
treasure boxes stored

sounds swarm the hall
testing its resilence
lights dance off shadows
to tease the eyes

massive boards of crowded buttons
awaiting their masters’ command
surrounded by hustle & bustle
I am focused on ….

the lonely mic stand
patiently waiting for someone
to breathe life back into it
yearning to amplify secret thots
surely written by a fevered heart
placed against a melody
once trapped only in the mind

SOON, the thotful melody
will be unleased upon
willing victims - ready to absorb
the bass to their backs
the drums to tickle their toes
the guitar to ring in their ears
the words weaving images in their minds
a collective of sensual energy
gathering power & force
stuck in the bull pen… for now

in a few short hours
these empty seats will fill
women in high heels
men lapping behind them
will flood this hall with
anticipation & starvation
craving a night of music food
to complete their lacking souls

to provide an escape, a release
to erase the day’s sad events
to celebrate the start of a union
to recall blissful memories

music will heal their wounds
music will expand their visions
music will lift their hearts
music will make me whole
once more if just tonight

when the final curtain falls
the trailer will open her craw
to recieve her puzzle treasures
for safe carting until tomorrow
in some other place
full of different people
awaiting their turn . . .